Another Friend Is Gone...

I have lost three friends in 6 months...all three because of cancer!

My friend Kate passed away last night, after a year long battle with cancer. She endured chemo, surgery & radiation. She seemed to be doing so well, yet the cancer was not gone from her body. The cancer came back with a vengeance. When I visited with her last, she was in a lot of pain and having trouble breathing. Within a week, she was in the hospital, and a few days later, Hospice was called for her comfort. I am so thankful that she is not suffering any longer, but so sad that she is not here with us.

Kate was a wife, mother and grandmother. She had friends, a church, and worked a job she enjoyed. The thing I liked most about her was her laugh. She had this way of suppressing her laugh that was so cute. It was as if she wanted to 'bust out laughing', but was trying to keep it under control. She always made me smile.

As I left her the last time, I gently kissed her head, told her I loved her, and told her to hang on. And hang on she did...longer than the doctors thought. She was a blessing in my life, and I am sure to everyone she met. I will miss Kate, but I know I will see her again. I imagine that she will be in Heaven either suppressing that laugh, or 'busting out' with joy. Either way, I am sure to smile!

2 Corinthians 1:2-4 (New International Version)

The God of All Comfort

²Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

³Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.

Welcome to the year 2010!

I am so excited to see what God has planned for us in this new year. It is time to put 2009's triumphs and trials behind us. It was a good year in many ways, but was also very difficult. I think the most significant times that I will remember about last year are:

1. Starting back to college after 16 years

2. Keegan's growth and maturity--band leadership, passing his dad in height, and learning to drive...'glimpses of maturity' as I call them!

3. The fantastic marching season that our kids had

4. A very real attempt to live with JOY

5. Getting to see my brother and sister-in-law

As I watch Keegan grow and mature, it becomes very clear that I need future plans for myself. He will go off soon enough, to his own life and his own career goals. Since he was born, I have always tried to live just one day at a time. I try very hard not to look to the distant future with him, because I want to enjoy every single milestone we pass, and every single bit of his teenage attitude! (Yes, I question myself about the attitude nearly every day!)

This new year is more than just who I am as a wife, mother and student; it is about being a better person. I want to be more Christ-like in my actions and attitudes. I want to extend myself to others more. I want to be more organized in my home and all the activities I choose to participate. This is the year I will strive each day to enjoy where I am in my life, and work to achieve happiness despite the circumstances.

Think about your chance this year. What will you do to improve yourself and your life? Will you allow yourself to enjoy life without getting bogged down in the everyday 'nitty-gritty' of living? It is a fresh start for all of us--lets make it the best year yet!

Psalm 31:14-15 (New King James Version)

¹⁴ But as for me, I trust in You, O LORD;
I say, “You are my God.”
¹⁵ My times are in Your hand;
Deliver me from the hand of my enemies,
And from those who persecute me

A Sign Of The Times

While traveling around town the last few nights, something seemed very different. What is it? Is there something missing some where? The answer is, Yes.

This is the Christmas season, the time between Thanksgiving and the New Year. It is a time of celebration to honor the birth of Jesus, God's only Son. Parties, parades, and special music fill our calendars. Christmas trees, twinkling lights, and .......that's it! Where are all the twinkling lights and yard decorations? Where are the inflatables that were so popular the last few years? Missing. They are packed away in garages and attics, just waiting to make their annual appearance.

2009 has been a year of change happening in our family and around our town. The sagging economy has burdened many in our community. Job loss and cut backs, plus the drop in the stock market have taken their toll on this small town. It is safe to say that the majority of us have had to cut back in many areas of our lives. Less frills and extras; and more savvy shopping and spending have transformed us. Indulgence in things we once enjoyed have been pared down, or eliminated all together.

What concerns me is that people that do not have the means to lavish gifts on their friends and loved ones this year will become downhearted and forget the true meaning of Christmas. (It occurs to me that the previous statement is true as well, especially when people do have the means to lavish gifts on friends and loved ones.) The spirit of giving goes well beyond monetary gifts and frills--giving from the heart, is the best way to honor God's precious gift of His Son. A selfless act to benefit someone else reflects a loving and generous spirit. According to the dictionary, a gift is: something given voluntarily without payment in return, as to show favor toward someone, honor an occasion, or make a gesture of assistance; present.

What kind of gifts do you give? Are they the latest and greatest gadgets money can buy? Or do you give the gift of time to spend with someone? Something flashy to show off to others, or a special deed to help someone out? What is your favorite or most memorable gift that was not monetary in nature, and blessed you enough to remember now? Could you bestow the same kind of gifts on someone else?

God gave us the ultimate gift; His only Son, Jesus. Jesus was born from a mother chosen by God, just as we were born from our mothers. He gave His only Son so that we can have eternal life with Him in Heaven. What better way to thank Him, than to give the gifts that mean the most--the gifts that come from our hearts.

When I started this post, I asked what was missing. The outward signs of celebration--twinkling lights and yard ornaments--seem to be vacant this year. The question is, are hearts vacant? Do we really understand that no matter what our status in life--whether we have money or do not--God gave us His Son, and we need to celebrate that special gift!

My prayer for you is that even if the outward appearance of celebration is missing this year, that your heart celebrates God's love in a big way. The kind of way that makes sweet memories, void of monetary indulgence.

Taking Control When the Odds Are Against You

(The following article was prepared and posted by me as part of a college scholarship essay contest. Comments are welcome.)

James “Rhio” O’Connor was a man that was fighting for his life against a monstrous cancer called Mesothelioma. “Mesothelioma is a rare form of cancer in which cancerous cells are found in the mesothelium, a protective sac that covers most of the body's internal organs. There are two main types of Mesothelioma - pleural which involves the sac that covers the pleural cavity around the lungs and peritoneal which involves the tissue that covers the abdominal area. The only accepted cause is exposure to asbestos. Asbestos was in thousands of different products so many people were exposed (to) [at] many times in their lives.” ( 1 ) The doctors were not optimistic about Rhio’s ability to survive the disease. He took it upon himself to find and research all information regarding Mesothelioma, its treatment, and its prognosis for survival. His self-acquired knowledge of the illness and its treatments enabled Rhio to make informed decisions that directed his care. Because of his tenacity and fortitude, he survived more than six years beyond the initial one-year prognosis. A memorial scholarship was created in honor of his courage and determination to educate and enlighten others, and to suggest that applicants contemplate what they might do, given a similar diagnosis with similar circumstances.

I do not have to speculate. At the age of 22 during my third year of college, I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, a cancer of the lymph nodes with causes unknown. Although the doctors told me that it was one of “the best” cancers to have, meaning it had a high cure rate, it did not diminish the tough treatment and recovery I would experience. It shook me to the core of my Christian faith. My family and I had never dealt with cancer, so we relied on the guidance of the specialists to initiate and continue my care. Although every step was explained to us, we felt as if someone was leading us blindly through a maze of options we did not fully understand. Remission was achieved, and I am a blessed 20-year survivor of that terrible disease!

If that were the end of the story, it would be a marvelous way to close a difficult chapter from my early adulthood. However, in the year 2000 at the age of 33, I fell ill with no explanation. For three months, I saw many specialists regarding my symptoms, yet there were no answers. As my health quickly declined, I finally found a doctor that really listened and cued in on my previous cancer diagnosis. Simple blood tests were ordered, and within 24 hours, Leukemia was suspected to be the cause of my dire symptoms. Within 48 hours of that visit, the hospital admitted me, tests were preformed, and a correct diagnosis became available: Acute Myelogenous Leukemia (AML). By that time the disease was very advanced, so I had to rely on the judgment of a Hematologist/Oncologist to direct my treatment. There was no time to spare, because I was married and had a young son to consider. Therefore, the most important factor in my situation was to start treatment quickly. My husband vowed to do what ever it took to get me well. After two months of grueling treatment in the hospital, remission was achieved. God performed another miracle on my behalf and once again, I had been given a new chance at life! During the following years, my judgment became clouded with thoughts that everything needed to be done quickly, in case my cancer returned. Fearing relapse is common among cancer survivors. Each disease has a period of remission before the word “cured” can be used, if ever. Some have to wait 5 years; some wait 10 or more. Although my “normal” way of life was nowhere near that of someone my age, I worked to accept my limitations and had faith that the Lord had a plan for my life. Gradually, I regained self-control when making decisions, and became optimistic about the future once again.

In 2007 I turned 40 years old, which was the age recommended for women to begin their yearly mammography screenings. ( 2 ) My risk of Breast Cancer was higher than average, due to the radiation given to treat the Hodgkin’s Disease nearly 20 years earlier. Therefore, in my mind, I would be an old woman when it happened…if it happened. The first screening showed abnormalities. I requested that my doctor arrange for the next screening to take place sooner, rather than later, as the clinic tried to tell me when I called to make an appointment. Knowing that false positives are common in screenings, I tried to stay calm in the interim before the next tests. However, while sitting in the waiting room, I was surrounded by older women who were in hospital gowns, talking about their breast cancer experiences. I prayed that the abnormality on my scans were a mistake, or at least nothing serious. In my head, I was trying to reassure my wandering mind that there was no way for a third cancer to strike so soon. I did not have to wait on test results for very long; I indeed had cancer for a third time! Breast Cancer. This time would be different though. This time, I would find out all of my options for treatment, and with all of the information gathered from the specialists and my own research, I would make the decision that was right for me. Just like Rhio, I was deciding on my own plan to fight against the dreaded disease of cancer.

My husband and I listened to the specialists, and read volumes of information on the subject of Breast Cancer. We accessed information from books, magazines, the web, and my doctors. In the end, it was our decision on how to proceed. I was fortunate to have more than one option, since the disease was caught by early detection. Surgery, regular check ups, and daily oral medication for 5 years is the extent of my treatment. I am so thankful I was spared anything worse, because I have already had a lifetime maximum of chemotherapy and radiation. My concern now turns to the recent recommendation that women do not need to start their mammography screening until the age of 50. There are many cases like mine--young women finding breast cancer during their 40‘s, or earlier. If the practice of self exam and routine mammograms at an early age are discontinued, many people will suffer needlessly. In fact, if I had waited until I was 50 to have my first mammogram, I would have been dead. There would be no options. My life would have ended long before it should have, and that is not right. I think that James “Rhio” O’Connor would agree with me if he was still living. His example of taking control when the odds were against him should be a shining example to all of us to take control of our own health care needs and never give up. Never.


1 Surviving Mesothelioma: A Patient’s Guide. “Mesothelioma Summary.”
Web. 8 December 2009

2 Recently, there has been a recommendation from the from the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force, Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality, Rockville, Maryland, to start routine mammogram screening at the age of 50, and to stop teaching self examination entirely.

The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force, Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality, Rockville, Maryland. “Summary of Recommendations and Evidence.”
Annuls of Internal Medicine 17 November 2009; vol. 151 no. 10 716-726.
Web. 9 December 2009